Come December

The month of December is unique in several ways. As the last month of the year, it not only makes us reflect, assess and ponder on the year about to finish, but also causes us to dwell on our purposes and priorities for the coming new year. It’s that time of the year when we are about to wrap up the year when the nearly completed 12 months of the year flash like a reel. A few months blurred and overlapping and others distinct and conspicuous by their extraordinariness.

Come December, we are filled with a strange combination of regrets, longing along with promise and hope. A year gone by, somewhat same as the last year, and yet different. A peculiar time, sort of a report card, where you place yourself in terms of contentment, happiness and success. A few regrets for not being able to fulfil some of your dreams and aspirations, a few reprimands where you didn’t make much of an effort for things which was supposedly meant to matter, some pats for what you did best and gladness for the surprises and gratitude for what you were blessed with.

The subjects in the report card differs from person to person along with its importance. Relationships, career, finance, health, contentment, wellness, spirituality – you rate yourself with the As, Bs and the Cs and summarise it for the year.

The time also denotes different things to different people. A year older, a year closer to mortality, a year to look forward to, a year of regret, a year to forget, a year to cherish, a year that was lucky. Often times, a single incident – a death of a loved one, a birth, a dream job, a new house, a personal milestone – marks the whole year and when December arrives, we have only that particular incident flashing as the representative of the whole year. It’s not easy talking about the end, how far we have come, stayed or grew.

Sometimes in December, the year seems too long and at others too short. Suddenly, the 12 months don’t seem to merge and we mull over the expiration of 365 whole days wondering how did we let go off a year without any memorable events, experiences and outcomes to add up? Even if there are, we usually tend to lose the thread of such moments and fail to recollect those nuggets of joy, serenity, satisfaction and accomplishments big and small.

One of the best and easiest ways to treasure these moments is to have a memory jar. We jot down in a few words about our best moments, lessons on a note every few days and drop it in the jar to be savoured at the end of every year. Believe me, it’s a treasure trove that makes Decembers pleasurable. Another way is journaling where you note your high, lows and in between moments to be browsed over end of the year.

It’s during December while taking stock of the year going by, we are also staring with hopeful eyes at the year that is soon arriving with its new possibilities, promises and opportunities. Every year, December hands over the baton to January giving us yet another opportunity, another chance to accomplish what we had aspired or wished to. There’s a tinge of anxiety, over expectation and nervousness too. It’s overwhelming considering the immense possibilities of the upcoming 365 days and the list of New Year resolutions is let loose with endless resolves all set with good intention.

December is also about celebrations, taking a break, going for vacations having done and dusted the whole year. There’s a sense of mirth in the air and a sweet anticipation for the approaching fun and relaxation in the holiday season. Although offices and educational institutes in India don’t shut down for two weeks like in many countries, many of us do go for the year-end break to soak in the last days of the year and to be invigorated for the next. There’s the Christmas and New Year’s eve, the gaiety, colour and camaraderie, family and friends, gifts, good food and drinks.

However, what I love about December, is its inherent connect to nature and the way it strongly sustains the rhythm of seasons. The autumn trees shedding old leaves and leading to the stark cold of winter sets the tone for December. To let go of certain things, to hang on to others. And to be at peace with it. That’s what nature teaches us so beautifully year after year.

Sometimes adversities compel us to lie dormant the way animals do to cope with the harshness of winter. The way winter hibernations and infuses creatures in the natural world with a new energy, hope and strength. The creatures curl up in a safe place and stay there till winter ends. Some of us do get the December blues, a combination of healing and raw wounds, wistfulness, nostalgia and cold grey weather perhaps. We all go through our own hibernations when we recede, conserve, introspect and rest. Only to emerge restored.

The shorter days and longer nights of December is also a valuable time to restore and nurture our interior and inner life. More gardening, reading, sleeping, nourishing food, soulful music, deep conversations, long walks, meditations, time with families and friends. It’s that time of the year when we also tend to look inwards, introspect
and reflect.

We tend to stay indoors due to the longer nights and for many of us, it’s the time when our home become our refuge and comfort. As day light becomes shorter, the winter, especially the month of December, seem to encourage us to slow down in the day and make time for rest. Despite being a month of celebrations, December is also known for its quietness and stillness, where we unplug, seek peace and are mindful of our own selves, family and nature around us.

So, as we are on the cusp of the old and the new and as December slowly slips away along with the year, let’s be gentler and kinder to ourselves and others. For a change, let’s finish the year grateful, soft and restful instead of always strong, competitive and busy.

Some beautiful lines on December that I recently read echoes in my mind: Let the last short days of December rest gently on your shoulders. You were here and you lived, breathed in air and took up space and changed the world so slightly. Let December hug you back, hold you until it’s gone. And December is not completely about endings, it heralds a beginning too.

As writer Hal Borland truly said, “Year’s end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instil in us.”