I was preparing for this day since I met an ailing Manoj Kaka in Puducherry last December.
The moment I received a text message from his niece Jhansi Apa saying ‘Kaka no more’, I couldn’t help the tears flow. I called Jhansi Apa immediately and she asked me to confirm the news to media.
I did and then sat silently — don’t know for how many hours. Going to Puducherry for his last rites was not a possibility for me in this pandemic situation.
Being a fan and an ardent admirer of Kaka, all the wonderful memories flooded my mind.
The day I called him to name my newborn, he said, ‘I will fix a day, I will sit on Sadhna, the name that will come to me from the divine source, that will be given. You have to promise me that even if you don’t like it, you will retain it because a part of divine energy will be attached to that name.
He fixed a date, sat on sadhna, called me later and gave me two options — ‘Nityashree’ or ‘Nilotpala’.
I took both names to call my daughter by. I took his energy. I kept a big part of his blessings attached to a larger part of my being.
He left the cage of a decayed body and is now a part of infinity. Like he always said, he was not afraid of death but of rebirth.
My only prayer for him is that he should never have a mortal body again. May he attain what we call ‘Moksh’.
His last words to me, “Don’t cry, surrender to the Mother” will remain with me as long as I live.
— By Debashreeta Mishra Kumar
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